More adventures with the 59 year old neighbor girl

Okay,so last Saturday afternoon I went over to the 59 year old chicks place to ask her if she knew when the bay bridge was going to re-open. She says “Maybe sometime next week.” She goes on to say “I know you go to city a lot on the weekends.” Right after this, I leave her place. On my way back, I see the dude that lives below me, sitting outside smoking.

I said “I find this kind of creepy that the neighbor girl knows when I come and go.”
He says “Maybe she likes you.”
I said “I think this chick is stalking me.”
I went on to say “She knows that I go to San Francisco on the weekends.”
He says “Maybe you told her.”
I said “That’s impossible because every time I go over there to ask her ask her about something, she just ends up rattling about wooden floors. In other words, I haven’t really told her sh-t.”

We exchange a few more words before he says “Hey, if you like her, just don’t tell her. She will get scared if you ask her if she has a boyfriend.” I then asked “What if I ask her about sex?” He just raises hands and then walks away from me.

Okay, so this brings me up to last night. I was reading lying on my bed reading “Then We Came to the End” by Joshua Ferris. On page 40 there is a passage that says “Some people actually generate revenue around here, you handjob.”

So I started wondering if this chick would really get offended if I asked her about sex. Deep down inside I keep hoping that maybe she will get fed up with me to the point that she will stop staring at me. Anyways, I go next door and ask “Hey Meg, can you tell me the meaning of this word in the passage.” She looks over at the book and I point at the word “handjob.” She just goes silent and then her lips do this weird pucker.

She goes “Uhh…”
I ask her “Is this a naughty word?”

She goes silent again.

Then I say “The last time I saw a strange words like this was when I took a French Literature class at UW back in the stone age.”

Still no response

I go “Yeah, I took the class because I wanted to meet more chick.”

Right after that comment, she closes the door on me and then shuts off her front porch light.

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